MTV Unplugged x Lauren Hill x Interlude 5
A little emotional today. The stress between school, work, and my personal life is getting to me. What makes me sad though is that a lot of times I forget to pray until I’m actually going though something. Then I feel guilty for not praying all the time and only when I need something, so I don’t. I’m ashamed that I haven’t been to church consistently in years, when I was raised going like 3 days a week. I still read my word every now and then and listen to gospel but it’s just not enough. Having that foundation and that support truly does change a person’s life. I miss my relationship with the Lord when it was easy. I’ve made so many excuses of why I haven’t really been like: not having a church home, being uncomfortable, afraid of change from this new lifestyle, etc. The longer I’m away from that foundation the weaker I become, the more lost I get, the more afraid I am. I really need to get back to that place….
I had soooo much fun in Atlanta for spring break I did not want to come back home! I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed my mom and friends until I got there. The weather is better and the people are more nice than they are here in Michigan that’s for sure. As soon as I got back to the city I wanted to leave. Now I’m back in boring ole school with boring people in stupid snow! I want to go back ):
Cherishing this time alone in my apartment just vibing to good music, practicing on my guitar, and dancing lol. It feels so good just to be by myself sometimes!! Everyday I’m constantly interacting with people at school and work, so it feels good to just have some me time. I usually commit to taking myself to a movie every weekend. I feel like that’s the best temporary getaway where you can be alone and it’s not awkward… well not for me at least lol.
Wishing to be something that you’re not is an insult to God. It’s like saying he didn’t make you good enough or he made you less than. He made every one of us a masterpiece. If you’re always comparing you’ll always see someone else more talented, more beautiful, and/or more successful.